Prologue:

Blips stood in front of a mirror, buffing his chassis with an air of absolute precision, his wrench-like hands gliding over the gleaming metal surface. His shades—an essential part of his aesthetic—rested perfectly on his tiny nose. Meanwhile, Grips was sprawled across a workbench, flicking candy wrappers at the corner of the room. The Chrononautilus, their time machine, sat in the center of the workshop like a neglected junk pile, its brass gears and mismatched parts quietly hissing.

"You know, Grips, your intellectual deficiencies never cease to amaze me," Blips muttered. "I do believe I could teach a rock more about basic time travel theory than I could ever hope to teach you."

Grips rolled her red eye and crushed a candy wrapper between her massive hands. "Yeah, yeah, big brain, whatever. Just tell me where we’re goin’ this time so I can get to smashing somethin’."

Blips smirked, adjusting his shades. "Today, we venture to the pinnacle of pre-Columbian civilization, the great city of Teotihuacan, around 400 CE. This metropolis, situated in the heart of Mesoamerica, was known for its grand pyramids and urban planning, a feat your pea-sized circuits could never fathom."

Grips grunted, standing up and stretching. "Sounds like a pile of rocks to me. Can I punch a pyramid?"

Blips' blue eyes flickered with indignation. "Punch? A pyramid?! You simpleton! We’re going to observe the craftsmanship and glory of ancient architecture, not destroy it."

Grips shrugged, clearly unimpressed. "Fine. But if I don’t get to punch somethin’, you’re buyin’ me a donut."

Blips sighed. "Victory will be mine, but not without a degree of suffering, I see. Let us proceed."

With a final flick of his shades, Blips tapped the Chrononautilus’ control panel, and the machine lurched into action.

As the time machine rattled and clanked through the time stream, Grips leaned over Blips’ shoulder, her single red eye narrowing at the array of flashing buttons. "Ya sure you know what you're doing, shiny? Last time we nearly ended up inside a volcano."

Blips rolled his eyes dramatically. "Your lack of faith is not only predictable but also deeply uninspired, Grips. I have absolute command over the temporal coordinates. Nothing, and I mean nothing, can—"

The Chrononautilus groaned and sputtered, the lights flickering as it came to a crashing halt.

"—go wrong," Blips finished with a grimace.

The doors creaked open, and the duo stepped into the ancient city of Teotihuacan, a bustling maze of stone streets, towering pyramids, and open-air markets. The Pyramid of the Sun loomed over them like a colossal mountain.

Grips cracked her knuckles. "Not bad. But what’s with all the people wearin’ feathers?"

Blips adjusted his shades and surveyed the scene. "Ah, the Teotihuacanos. Renowned for their artistry, urban planning, and religious ceremonies. I must say, their architectural prowess rivals even that of the Egyptians."

"Blah blah blah. Can we go find a donut stand or somethin’?" Grips interrupted, her eye scanning the marketplace for food.

Blips huffed. "The only thing you're likely to find here is maize cakes and cacao beans. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to inspect the Pyramid of the Moon. You, meanwhile, try not to break anything. Or anyone."

As Blips ventured toward the Pyramid of the Moon, Grips found herself drawn to a raucous commotion near the city center. A crowd had gathered around a massive stone arena, and from the sound of it, they were chanting excitedly.

Grips' eye gleamed. "Now that sounds like my kinda fun."

She elbowed her way through the crowd and found herself looking down at a gladiatorial pit. Below, two massive warriors clad in jaguar pelts clashed, wielding obsidian-tipped clubs. The crowd cheered as the combatants exchanged blows, and Grips’ grin widened.

"Oh yeah, this is more like it."

Without a second thought, she leapt into the pit, landing with a heavy thud that shook the ground. The crowd gasped as the two gladiators stopped in their tracks, staring up at the hulking metal giant that had just interrupted their battle.

One of them roared a challenge, brandishing his club at Grips.

Grips chuckled, her fists clenching with excitement. "You wanna dance? Let’s go!"

She charged forward, grabbing the nearest gladiator and hurling him across the arena like a rag doll. The second one swung his club at her, but Grips caught it mid-air, snapping it in half with ease.

"Nice try, tough guy, but I’m tougher!" she taunted, as the crowd erupted in cheers.

Meanwhile, at the base of the Pyramid of the Moon, Blips was admiring the intricate carvings on a stone tablet when he heard the distant roar of the crowd.

"That can’t be good," he muttered. "I specifically told her not to—"

Before he could finish his thought, a stray feathered headdress flew through the air, landing squarely at his feet.

Blips' eyes widened. "Someone threw a spanner in the works…again."

Blips sprinted back to the arena, arriving just in time to see Grips standing victoriously in the center of the pit, surrounded by defeated gladiators and broken clubs. The crowd was chanting her name, throwing flowers and bits of food into the arena.

"Marvelous! You've surpassed even my most pessimistic expectations," Blips said sarcastically, stepping into the pit. "Do you have any idea what you’ve done? You’ve just beaten two of Teotihuacan’s finest warriors! This is supposed to be an observational mission!"

Grips shrugged, wiping sweat from her metal brow. "What can I say, shiny? They started it."

Blips groaned. "We are going to have to leave immediately before you cause an international incident. Get back to the Chrononautilus before you’re crowned queen of Teotihuacan!"

Grips smirked. "Could be worse. They give me free donuts for life?"

Epilogue:

Back in the workshop, Blips was once again polishing his chassis, his circuits still frazzled from the chaos of Teotihuacan. Grips was lounging on a workbench, munching on a piece of maize cake she’d smuggled back.

"Well, that wasn’t so bad, was it?" Grips said with a grin.

Blips glared at her. "I swear, Grips, next time, I’m leaving you in the time stream."

Grips chuckled. "We’ll see, shiny boy. We’ll see."

The workshop filled with the sound of buffing, the hum of ancient history, and the promise of yet another ridiculous adventure.